Tag Archives: ruins

Never Losing the Light: Showers of Blessing?

Your time of blessing is quickly approaching now. Things that seemed withered and dead will begin to become green and supple again. Resource will water every part of your life.

Streams and brooks will form and it will be as I told you, “I will give you much so that you will have much to give away.” [2 Cor. 9:112 Cor. 9:11
English: World English Bible - WEB

11 you being enriched in everything to all liberality, which works through us thanksgiving to God.

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There will always be stormsStill… there will be storms.

Actually, there will always be some sort of storm.

We are in the final days of My church. The storm and conflict in the heavenly realm is constant thunder and lightening.

There is much to do.

Do not fear the storms… accept. I AM with you. That is all you really need to know.

I cannot make your barreness like Eden without the ministry the storms bring.

Accept!Accept.

Receive.

It is all part of My plan, remember?

Receive ministry from the storms that blow across your life.

I promise you, it is there if you will be willing, and receive.

Take each one and know that I AM there—behind the scenes—blessing you.

You know already that blessing sometimes comes in strange packages.

showers of blessingNevermind… just receive.

All is well child.

To be like Eden, a well-watered garden, the storms must come.

It’s all part of the plan.

Accept. Receive. It’s Me.

There shall be showers...“And the LORD will bless Israel again, and make her deserts blossom; her barren wilderness will become as beautiful as the Garden of Eden. Joy and gladness will be found there, thanksgiving and lovely songs.”

Isaiah 51:3Isaiah 51:3
English: World English Bible - WEB

3 For Yahweh has comforted Zion; he has comforted all her waste places, and has made her wilderness like Eden, and her desert like the garden of Yahweh; joy and gladness shall be found therein, thanksgiving, and the voice of melody.

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A Closer Walk: Is This Abundant?

I sat in my ashes each day thinking, “Is this what God calls abundant?” I really wanted to experience the abundant life Jesus spoke of, but how in the world was I supposed to look at the shambles my life had become, and see it as abundance?

fire and brimstone pulpitI was raised believing in a God who was much too holy and righteous for the likes of me.

Whenever the “fire of heaven” would rain down from our church’s pulpit, I would shrink under my daddy’s arm, trying to hide.

I believed God was scary, angry, and wanted to send me to hell!

The church people I grew up with spoke of heaven, and going there someday “in the sweet by-n-by,” (whatever that was) but then they would do, or say, the most horrible things to, or about, one another!

All this got filed into my own internal file drawers.

By the time I reached eighteen, and was free to begin to make some decisions of my own, I was not sure of much, but one thing I was certain about. I did not want anything to do with God, church, or church people.

the prodigal roadSo I chose “the world” and a prodigal-road, which of course led to even greater hurts, disappointments, and failures.

At age 28, after being on that broken road for ten years I came to the conclusion that nothing I had found in “the world” was worth having, including Christianity.

I believed life held nothing but pain and I was weary of it.

I wanted relief and peace, so I came to the erroneous conclusion that the only logical thing to do was to end my life, thereby ending my pain.

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Enter for the first time this Abba-God speaking and asking a very simple question.

“When will you trust me?”

That’s all I heard but it really spooked me.

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Who was this Voice speaking?

And why was He talking to me?

I’ll admit I was shaken, but I was also intensely curious. Could I have been all wrong about God being absent and uncaring?

I had to know the answer to that question and so I began my quest to try to get to know who God really was.

I wanted to know if I could really trust Him?

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I joined a church. I got baptized. (Admittedly one of the most wonderful days of my life!) I read through my Bible cover to cover, many times. I studied. I joined. I volunteered. I served. I did everything I could think of, all questing after this holy grail of “becoming an Overcomer-Christian.”

I wanted to be a Christian who not only knew God, but also one who totally trusted Him, and therefore God would be pleased.

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See a pattern here?

I didn’t.

So I wholeheartedly pursued God outwardly, yet still struggled to navigate all my inner-storms of unanswered questions and self-doubts that refused to be silent.

I kept thinking, “How can THIS be it!”

It all “looked right”  from the outside but it all “felt wrong” on the inside.

Image result for fast forward symbolNow fast forward to the days after leaving the hospital.

Once again, life is in ruins after having tried it ALL.

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I reasoned that, “I had held up my end.” with my wholehearted devotion to The Quest—but God had not held up His.

I mean, twenty years and here I was sitting in the ashes, again?

How was I supposed to reconcile this promised “abundant life” with my personal world in ruins?

Where was I supposed to begin to start over again?

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INNER TURBULENCE

There is nothing happening in you that escapes My notice.

How often you come to Me with prayers and petitions about what is happening around you, when the greater issue is what is going on—on the inside.

The anxious thoughts and jealous fears.

The resentments and bitterness you feel over your losses.

The anger because of what others have done.

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I AM much more concerned with the storms on the inside of your heart and mind rather than your outside issues of finances, possessions, relationships, and health.

Oh Sweetheart, it’s your heart and those inner storms you are fighting! First we must deal with those, then we can address all the wreckage from the outer squalls.

(You know I AM right.)

Come, take the time today for an inventory of the inner turbulence. We can deal with this. There is nothing we can’t handle together—and I AM here—right here.

Image result for jehovah shammahI AM Jehovah-Shammah for those sins weighing you down.

I AM Jehovah-Shammah with forgiveness.

I AM Jehovah-Shammah with tender compassion.

I AM Jehovah-Shammah with wisdom and correction.

I AM present My beloved, My own.

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How I love you. How I listen for your slightest sigh!

Come to Me. I have your peace. I have your joy. Only I can give you these things.

(You know this.)

I see the weight on your soul.

Let me lift, (ah yes,) lift those weary cares off your heart.

Come.

There is abundant grace here, in My arms.

a closer walk

 

“Lord, you know how I long for my health once more. You hear my every sigh.”

Psalm 38:9Psalm 38:9
English: World English Bible - WEB

9 Lord, all my desire is before you. My groaning is not hidden from you.

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Cemetery Prayers

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God? I am haunting my ruins again. Wandering past the old gravestones of long dead hopes and dreams.

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Lord?

Why do I do it?

Why do I keep coming back here?

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Why do I haunt this place?

These dreams no longer dance—no longer sing—no.

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It’s so silent here and dark, but I keep coming back, sometimes to weep and feel the pain again, sometimes to just stand and stare—feeling so lost.

Oh, God!

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I’m lost to me but I’m not lost to You.

You know the answers to all my questions.

I thought I’d surrendered all my Why’s?

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I guess not.

Maybe it’s time to ask some new questions.

Questions like…

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“Where?” or “Who?” or “What?”

Anything but, why?

Such a useless thing—why.

What good is why?

Will an answer bring a resurrection or breathe life into these graves?

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Don’t answer God.

You don’t need to.

We both know the answer to that one!

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Save me from myself God.

You’re the only One who can!

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Forget these graves… breathe life back into me!

My heart feels as cold as these marble monuments.

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And just as hard.

Only You can save me…

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Heal me.

The DREAM-MAKER’S Promise:

“Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; Save me, and I shall be saved.” Jeremiah 17:14Jeremiah 17:14
English: World English Bible - WEB

14 Heal me, O Yahweh, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for you are my praise.

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NKJV

The Caterpillar’s Prayer:

Abba… Daddy-God, I have no hope but You. I have no prayer but this,”Heal me …breathe on these dry bones.”