Tag Archives: I Surrender

Never Losing The Light: Surrendering Memories

Surrendering memories is not easy, but no, I won’t TAKE your memories from you. You must CHOOSE to lay them down in surrender to Me.

I have so much more for you—so much LIFE!

surrender the memoriesBut, you must surrender these things bringing death to your spirit; things like unforgiveness, resentment, bitterness, anger, jealousy, envy—these are poison child.

You want Me to free you, but I tell you, YOU are the jailer of your soul. You hold the keys.

How I long for your freedom—your joy.

(You long for it, too.)

I know. But, not enough yet.

(That’s right… not enough.)

You want to be free while holding on to these toxic emotions.

It can’t be done.

(Do you hear Me…)

Let go!

Yes, what was done to you was wrong.

(You don’t understand?)

Shall I tell you a secret?

There is no “understanding” SIN.

There is only surrendering it—then there is the overcoming!

That is why I came.

That is why I died.

To cover you with the overcoming blood sacrafice…

To transform your pain…

To peace.

Never Losing the Light“Never envy the wicked! Soon they fade away like grass and disappear… Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him to help you do it and he will. Your innocence will be clear to everyone. He will vindicate with the blazing light of justice shining down as from the noonday sun. Rest in the Lord; wait patiently for him to act. Don’t be envious of evil men who prosper. Stop your anger! Turn off your wrath. Don’t fret and worry—it only leads to harm. For the wicked shall be destroyed, but those who trust in the Lord shall be given every blessing. Only a little while and the wicked shall disappear. You will look for them in vain.

Psalm 37: 1, 2, 5-11Psalm 37: 1, 2, 5-11
English: World English Bible - WEB

37 By David. 1 Don’t fret because of evil-doers, Neither be envious against those who work unrighteousness. 2 For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, And wither like the green herb. 5 Commit your way to Yahweh. Trust also in him, and he will do this: 6 He will make your righteousness go forth as the light, And your justice as the noon day sun. 7 Rest in Yahweh, and wait patiently for him. Don’t fret because of him who prospers in his way, Because of the man who makes wicked plots happen. 8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath. Don’t fret, it leads only to evildoing. 9 For evildoers shall be cut off, But those who wait for Yahweh shall inherit the land. 10 For yet a little while, and the wicked will be no more. Yes, though you look for his place, he isn’t there. 11 But the humble shall inherit the land, And shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.

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A Closer Walk: Closet Control Freak

closet control freakI always believed, “I am NOT a closet control freak—I am a person of order.” A place for everything and everything in its place. That’s my motto. Chaos of mind or situation is NOT my thing. I have been accused many times of being a control freak, and to some of that I plead guilty, but guilty with good reason.

(She said smiling.)

I grew up in chaos, so I learned early in life, that if I was going to have any sense of peace or order I would have to create it myself.

my messy life

I have tried to come to some sort of truce with myself about all of this; to “give myself a break” because a child does the best they can with what life hands them, and sometimes—the coping mechanisims that were our friends in childhood—become our enemies in adulthood.

Ah, but giving them up… there’s the rub!

There isn’t anything inherently wrong with an orderly life. There’s actually a scripture that calls for us to live that way.

Again, the difficulty is that many times chaos in life is not the exception, it is the norm. Life, especially in our day and times, is full of unexpected catastrophes of endless variety. Control is only a cherished illusion. Much as I hate it, it is a truth that must be faced with honesty—but also with faith and hope.

Yeah, life goes crazy on us, but though we must acknowledge that we are not in control of anything, we can still place our faith and hope in a God who is in control of everything.

faith NOT fear(Selah?)

So, if God is in total control, then why did He allow my disaster to happen you might ask?

And to that, I give you one key word: AGENDA.

We have an agenda for our lives, but God has His, and when our agenda collides with His, well guess who wins every, single, time?

God is in control

I like what John Koessler said about agendas,

Jesus is an equal opportunity disappointer. Jesus was a disappointment, not only for people like those of Nazareth, where they drove Him out of the synagogue and tried to throw Him off a cliff, because He wouldn’t perform miracles for them, but for people in Korazin and Bethsaida, where He did perform miracles. Jesus was a disappointment to friends and foes alike… we are disappointed with Jesus because we do not see what He is really doing. It turns out that we have been laboring under a major misapprehension. Jesus came for us, but that does not mean He came to please us. Jesus came for us, but He does not answer to us. Jesus came for us, but He will not subject Himself to our agenda, no matter how good that agenda might be. Instead, Jesus demands that we submit ourselves to His agenda.   (Why Jesus Always Disappoints)

When I talk to others (like myself) who are struggling with disillusionment and disappointment with God, there is this reoccurring issue; this matter of control—God’s agenda vs. ours.

Oh, we don’t come right out and say that we think we know better than an Omniscient God. But scratch the surface of our best Christian facade, and you will find a closet control freak, fighting to get out.

journal

IT’S NOT MAN’S WAY

I know how much you hate it ~ being weak.

You want to conquer this thing you’re struggling with.

You want to be in control again, yes?

God in control

No… but “No.” with an explanation.

Listen My dear child, if strength were the best thing for you right now, would I not give it? You know I always do the best thing for your growth and perfection. (But, My definition of perfection, not yours.)

You want to be perfect—I want to: perfect.

(It’s not what you wanted Me to say.)

I know.

But you know Love does the best thing, not necessarily the easiest thing.

God in our ruins

(Yes, you’re right.)

It would be easy to give you this thing you’ve requested.

But, do you want the dream your way?

Do you know what the cost would be, to yourself, to others?

Do you want this dream to be less than it could be?

These are questions only you can answer. To be perfected from suffering you must yield to it ~ not clench your fists and stiffen your neck. You decide if you want everything you have asked Me for.

God's mission: partnership

I’ll wait right here, as I have been, since this tug-of-war started between us.

You must decide, whether you are to be powerful, or I AM to be powerful in you.

This is the way My Kingdom works.

It’s not man’s way, it’s Mine, Decide.”

a closer walk

 

“…No. But I am with you; that is all you need. My power shows up best in weak people.”

2 Corinthians 12:92 Corinthians 12:9
English: World English Bible - WEB

9 He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Most gladly therefore I will rather glory in my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may rest on me.

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