I grew up with condemnation and criticism. It was well meant (sometimes) but still, it’s tough to breathe in that world. Tougher still, to grow into the decent and kind person, you want to be. All you can “think” in that atmosphere is, escape… I have to escape.
Yeah, rejection is a powerful toxin—and verbal abuse a stone killer.
When will we learn that?
Why do we believe that we can control, and own others, by battering another’s poor heart into a million, shattered, and broken pieces?
I didn’t understand the power of bitterness as a child, but I could feel it.
I used to think that kind of enviornment was normal. (It was all I knew.) Then later, I knew I had to find something different, because I was becoming like my abusers. My “normal” was corroding my heart into something I no longer recognized—into a someone I didn’t want to be. I knew if I wanted to breathe, if I wanted to love and be loved, I had to get away.
I had to lay down the dead hopes that my family would magically change and choose something better than their old and bitter verbal artillery.
So, I laid down a dead dream, and picked up His cross.
For a time, I believed all that “broken stuff” was wasted debris. That, not only could it NOT be fixed, but the dead weight of it had to be jettisoned from my life. (And there is some truth to that.) Some toxic relationships, no matter how much sweet water gets poured into them, will by their own heart’s choices, choose to remain bitter.
Yet, even though the people we had hoped would love us, reject our love—even those difficult experiences can be wonderfully useful for His Kingdom.
It is His M.O. in us, after all!
He is: A Ransom-Redeemer, A Reviver-Restorer. The Royal-Resurrecter!
It has taken me six decades, count them, SIX long-n-dusty… bloody-n-broken… rocky-road-decades, but I have finally learned these Kingdom Truths:
God wastes NOTHING.
Our SCARS and DEBRIS are someone else’s HEALING and HOPE.
Forsaking ALL will lead us straight to HIS REDEMPTION PLAN.
And His plan?
Will BLOW destiny’s doors off their JOY-HINGES!
He rebuilds shattered lives into bridges—strong sturdy bridges that will carry other shattered hearts straight into His loving arms of Redeeming Grace.
Yahoo, what an awesome Savior!
THEN… YOU WILL KNOW
There will be times when you will do your best, you will pray, you will believe, and still things will seem to go wrong. You may even be tempted to think, all you’ve done is worth nothing; only empty space.
This is where the wheat and the chaff go their seperate ways.
It is easy to work when all are pleased and the applause abounds. I have many in My Kingdom who will serve under such circumstances, many.
Ah, but when the wind is contrary, how those “easy-chair-followers” scatter!
And, you? What about you now that you see what is really in their hearts? Will you leave Me, too?
I tell you, building this Kingdom of Mine is not for the faint of heart. The day is quickly approaching when the enemy will come in like a flood. There will be testing and trying like My Church has never seen! Many will forsake their friends and betray those they called “brother.”
I AM coming to do away with these easy-chairs, and all who cling to them! (But you?) You are My First Fruit! You will show the way to those who remain. You will encourage their hearts by your words of comfort.
Then, “Ha, then!” it will not seem in vain. Then, you will see your Teacher, and you will know how wise were your appointed lessons.
Yes, then, your work will stand.
“…but my work for them seems all in vain;”
Isaiah 49:4Isaiah 49:4
English: World English Bible - WEB
4 But I said, I have labored in vain, I have spent my strength for nothing and vanity; yet surely the justice due to me is with Yahweh, and my recompense with my God.