I had been told for years that depression was simply part of my family’s DNA. I had accepted those statements as fact, without questioning, so the depression I was experiencing didn’t surprise me. Indeed, I had almost expected it. It was part of our family history, like some genetic trait that couldn’t be escaped; could only be feared and endured.
That is what I had always believed.
I was wrong.
God was beginning to dismantle my erroneous beliefs and this one wasn’t going down without a fight. The battlefield? My mind. My thinking. The grid-system, where all of God’s truth got filtered through my beliefs, to get to my heart.
Somewhere in that crucial 18-inch-journey, truth was getting severely twisted, so that by the time it reached my heart it had no power.
You have probably heard it said, God takes us where He finds us, but He loves us too much to leave us there.
True, true, true.
The love of God through the Holy Spirit, began to tear down my faulty beliefs to show me, the reason I kept losing these battles with depression was because I was trying to fight them in my own strength.
I had “carried” the responsibility for my own self-care all of my life—but it was time to lay that burden down—time to let go of the crushing weight of my own self-protection.
- Letting go of the belief that weakness was a bad thing.
- Letting go of the belief that surrender to Christ’s Love was to be feared.
- Letting go of the belief that I was helpless to change for the better.
- Letting go of the belief that I had no hope of overcoming enemies like fear, abandonment, doubt, and depression.
- Letting go of the belief that Christ’s Kingdom Power would come without battles.
It was time to embrace The Truth, and let His Truth, embrace my depression.
It was time to start believing in A Conquering King whose Light always, always, wins, no matter how deep the darkness.
It was time to believe that I was dearly loved.
It was time to trust that He could get me through any storm.
It was time to accept His Kingdom Truth when thinking about myself.
I WAS: a child of The Most High God, born into His Kingdom and given an inheritance with power, authority, and might. I was infinitely valuable. I was deserving of love, kindness, and respect. I was loved without limits. I was worthy of being cherished—and I was! ALL that was His, (Christ’s) had been bequeathed to ME!
He had always said it.
Now it was time for me to believe it!
REPENT AND I WILL RESTORE
Why are My children so afraid of surrender?
Can a drowning man save himself by fighting and thrashing against his Rescuer? (Of course not.) But when you decide to go out in your own strength to fight your own battles?
Haven’t I taught you?
Are you still not clear as to this Kingdom Law?
Sometimes child, I AM so disappointed in My children.
Yes (even you) because you know better than this!
Your battles are not yours; never have been. But the choices, they are yours; always have been!
What have I told you over and over again?
“For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;” 2 Cor. 10:4
When you insist on fighting for yourself and with the world’s weapons?
Why are you surprised at the meager outcome?
I AM your strength—I AM!
Come, remember what you have been taught. You are in a war to end all wars! There are cannon flash and explosions in the heavenlies. Great is the storm and conflict between LIGHT and DARKNESS… great is the cunning and stealth of the enemy’s agents.
Come, forget the past—repent and I will restore.
The battle rages, and we (My forces and I) have great need of you. I have created you for just this hour. Put on your armor. Surrender your will and your ways. The battle is Mine ~ I AM your strength! Nothing can defeat My will (except your own willfulness).
Lay it down—surrender all to Me.
Then, you can’t lose!
“I will love thee, O Lord, MY STRENGTH.”
REPENT: Original Word: “greek” metanoia.
Short Definition: I repent—I change my mind.
Definition: I repent, change my mind, change the inner man (particularly with reference to acceptance of the will of God), repent.